Tuesday, February 5, 2008

Deadchester No Longer: The Silence is Broken Part 1



Let me spin you a yarn here for a moment. It all begins 4 weekends ago in the peaceful village of Westchester. Many have often commented on changing the name to Deadchester in lieu of the fact that nothing ever happens here. Well, that peaceful silence and innocence was shattered about 2:30am on that Saturday night/Sunday morning 4 weekends ago.

As per usual we were playing guitar hero til the wee hours of the morn with our compatriots Rog and Ash. Miranda was attempting to sleep but due to our raucous party in the basement, it never came. She soon heard a crash that she attributed to Roger or my carelessness however upon leaving our house at around noon the next day for a delicious Pancheros burrito, we discovered that it wasn't Roger and I who caused the crash but a vandal breaking my drivers side, passenger window.

I was enraged.

First of all it's frickn single digits out here without the windchill and second of all we just have liability on the car which means outta pocket. Furthermore, who the hell thinks they have the right to bash in my car window and not even steal all of my tools that I carried with me, nor any of my other random articles in the car. All joking aside, I felt violated, and to be honest I was a little nervous that someone had it out for us for whatever reason.

Well that brings us to this weekend. The village of Westchester had been silent yet again for 3 weeks, only to be awakened this time at 4:15 ish by the thud of 3 terribly weak blows followed by an SUV of some sort speeding away from a crime scene. Ironically enough just before this happened Miranda's cell went off from an accidental call from an old college friend. Thus we weren't fully asleep and were quickly woken by the commotion somewhere close. Miranda claimed to have heard a sound downstairs so I abruptly grabbed my "gear" and went to investigate and clear the house.

The house was clear, however as I glanced out onto my snow covered car I noticed something amiss. I threw on my parka and headed out, "gear" in hand just in case I was flanked on my way outside. As I rounded the back end of my car and I stood there in utter rage and bewilderment, gawking and cussing at the non-existent drivers side window and broken mirror.

In a rage I ran to call the cops and they showed up post haste to access the problem. They basically said they're going to post someone near our house considering this was the second time a crime was committed against us. Do we have enemies? Meanwhile I was just pissed because how many times will I have to get the window fixed only to have it bashed in again.

Suffice it to say I couldn't go back to bed. I sat at our dining room table devising ways to catch the crook, ie buying a video camera for 24 hour surveillance as well as possible safeguards in and around the house should the perps choose to harass more than our car. Eventually sleep did come only I was aroused a few hours later.

"Josh, the cops are on the phone," Boo urged.
"This is Josh."
"We've got em, I need you to come in, in about an hour to press charges," the officer said.
"I'll be there in 30 minutes!"

To be honest, the story only gets better, but I don't really have time to keep writing, stay tuned for Part 2 of Deadchester No Longer: The Faces of DOoshbaggery

5 comments:

Angie and Tony Metz said...

I will be on the edge of my seat until part two is posted!

Angie and Tony Metz said...

Josh, I just read this post to Angie and her quote was "What a Jerk! He can't leave us hanging like that! He's got plenty of time to write part II." Yes, that was my sweet little wife Angie.

Josh said...

I know this will come as a surprise but I procrastinate. I've got report cards due next week and I've now got all the things from the trimester that I've put off to now do. SO hopefully the next chapter of this saga will be released sometime this weekend or shortly there after. It's really hard to keep the five people who read this pleased! Laters

upe said...

HURRY UP BITCH I NEED MY LOCORANTS!

Anonymous said...

Gerade, was notwendig ist. Das interessante Thema, ich werde teilnehmen. cialis kaufen billig viagra generika [url=http//t7-isis.org]viagra bestellen per nachname[/url]